Erik (sargonepsilon) wrote,

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Jobs I would like to have, but am unlikely to get

Bouncer: This may sound fairly mundane, but every bouncer I've ever spoken too really seemed to love their job. You stand in a club looking imposing, and hot chicks flirt with you to try and cut in line. I bet bribes aren't uncommon, and every once in awhile you get to beat up an asshole who deserves it. Plus you can sleep in as late as you want. If I was 4 inches taller and 100lbs heavier I'd be all over this.

Fighter Pilot: I'm too tall, and it's probably not as cool as I imagine, but have you ever seen a dogfight? Shazam!

Captain Morgan/Marlboro Man/etc: Did you know they actually pay people to dress up, go to bars, and give away free stuff while generally being a fun guy? I would happily do this for very little money, but I'm pretty sure you have to be somebody’s relative to get it. It's not like they hold interviews.

Game Designer/Tester: Board games, computer games, card games, whatever. Games are fun. Making them better is more fun. I've been doing this in various forms as a hobby since I was like 10. Yes I know that makes me a Dork.

Professional Party Guest: I think you have to be famous, or a really hot chick, to actually get paid just to show up at a party, but if there was a demand for male guests I could flourish in that market. I would meet with the host before hand and get to know them a bit, so people wouldn't know I was paid. Then I'd run around the party being entertaining and making the host sound cool. Any takers? Payment is negotiable...
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